Even as I move on, there will always be a part of me that belongs to her. As I look back, I realize that for a little while, I had something beautiful. It may not have been the right person or perfect, but it was nice to only love for one person in my life and know that for a time I was loved in return.
Maybe it was not her entirely that I was looking for, but the feeling of being in love. Love may be transient and may devastate when we lose it, but I could never see myself abandoning it. It has too much of a hold on me like a drug.
This is a good realization. So many times after something like this happens, I would usually vow to never love again and just burn through endless an string of flings. Granted, I am beginning to separate sex and love, I will always have a little difficulty having sex without tying a bit of emotion to it. I guess that is just the way I am and I need to just learn to tame them a little better.
I know that things will get better with time. This was just another torrent of experience that will add to my story.
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